Nice essay Michael. I am a newish lurker. I grew up in NY and have lived on both coasts as well as inland in a few places. I settled for good in MN in 1995 after a previous stint. My experience has been different. For me, there will always be a difference between what I might want and what exists. I am retired and have an enormous number of interests that connect me "with the natives". I like it here immensely. The gap between what I wish for and what it is like is not that large IMO. It is far from perfect but that's how it works.
Thanks for the comment, Mark, good to meet you and please, no need to lurk! ;-) We would probably enjoy hanging IRL as I was raised on the East Coast (Maryland) and get along with transplants to the Midwest from both coasts. Probably my piece is more about how 21st century tech and new social habits have exacerbated problems already existing in any given location. I'm sure there are places where people have come together surprisingly well post-COVID, etc. Don't be a stranger here, and please feel welcome to comment any time you wish. Cheers, Mike
I shall. I am already oversubscribed I fear and will soon winnow the list. If every subscription did not mean more nonsense in my Notes feed, it would be easier as you used to be able to be intentional the circles you chose. I have a list of URLs I survey and will likely shift some subs to there to lighten the load in Notes. While we sold our home of 30 years, I am engaged with at least five different groups and each one of them so different than the other. The 21st century 1st world "problems" are interesting. During the pandemic I nurtured a monthly zoom with my family relatives and we rediscovered family all over. Again not perfect but with a little push some of us reconnected. Many of us are relatives because of a snippet of DNA -- it has been fun to find them -- one of my newest FAVES lives in Maryland! Will watch for your Op-Ed. My Substack About is me in a nutshell
This squares with my experience of Minnesota. Most of the people I made friends with during the 5 years we lived there were also transplants. Not all, but most. It seemed like most natives preferred to spend time with the folks the made friends with in K-12.
That said, now I live in Iowa, where the group of friends I spend the most time with is half people I befriended in high school, so perhaps I'm not one to talk.
The exceptions are the places I volunteer, including my neighborhood association. They're good ways to meet like-minded folks who I enjoy spending time with. So that might be my one prescription for the loneliness epidemic: get your neighborhood association active, and find ways to volunteer.
Great suggestion about the neighborhood ass'n, Kelcey! I've also been thinking of volunteering at artist workshops and maker labs...a lot of creativity and innovation energy at places such as those.
Thanks for sharing, and I hope to reread it in the Strib. As a sixth grade teacher, I’m curious about the writing team that you mentioned. Increasingly, educators struggle to get middle schoolers connected with each other and connected to their school. Too many kids want to isolate themselves at home on video games, toxic social media sites, etc. The more kids can be a part of a “team,” the better. And the same goes for the rest of us.
The direction we're all headed (lead by technology, it seems) doesn't bode well for team-building and consensus-making. Maybe schools (and families) can help divert this course.
Nice essay Michael. I am a newish lurker. I grew up in NY and have lived on both coasts as well as inland in a few places. I settled for good in MN in 1995 after a previous stint. My experience has been different. For me, there will always be a difference between what I might want and what exists. I am retired and have an enormous number of interests that connect me "with the natives". I like it here immensely. The gap between what I wish for and what it is like is not that large IMO. It is far from perfect but that's how it works.
Thanks for the comment, Mark, good to meet you and please, no need to lurk! ;-) We would probably enjoy hanging IRL as I was raised on the East Coast (Maryland) and get along with transplants to the Midwest from both coasts. Probably my piece is more about how 21st century tech and new social habits have exacerbated problems already existing in any given location. I'm sure there are places where people have come together surprisingly well post-COVID, etc. Don't be a stranger here, and please feel welcome to comment any time you wish. Cheers, Mike
I shall. I am already oversubscribed I fear and will soon winnow the list. If every subscription did not mean more nonsense in my Notes feed, it would be easier as you used to be able to be intentional the circles you chose. I have a list of URLs I survey and will likely shift some subs to there to lighten the load in Notes. While we sold our home of 30 years, I am engaged with at least five different groups and each one of them so different than the other. The 21st century 1st world "problems" are interesting. During the pandemic I nurtured a monthly zoom with my family relatives and we rediscovered family all over. Again not perfect but with a little push some of us reconnected. Many of us are relatives because of a snippet of DNA -- it has been fun to find them -- one of my newest FAVES lives in Maryland! Will watch for your Op-Ed. My Substack About is me in a nutshell
This squares with my experience of Minnesota. Most of the people I made friends with during the 5 years we lived there were also transplants. Not all, but most. It seemed like most natives preferred to spend time with the folks the made friends with in K-12.
That said, now I live in Iowa, where the group of friends I spend the most time with is half people I befriended in high school, so perhaps I'm not one to talk.
The exceptions are the places I volunteer, including my neighborhood association. They're good ways to meet like-minded folks who I enjoy spending time with. So that might be my one prescription for the loneliness epidemic: get your neighborhood association active, and find ways to volunteer.
Great suggestion about the neighborhood ass'n, Kelcey! I've also been thinking of volunteering at artist workshops and maker labs...a lot of creativity and innovation energy at places such as those.
Thanks for sharing, and I hope to reread it in the Strib. As a sixth grade teacher, I’m curious about the writing team that you mentioned. Increasingly, educators struggle to get middle schoolers connected with each other and connected to their school. Too many kids want to isolate themselves at home on video games, toxic social media sites, etc. The more kids can be a part of a “team,” the better. And the same goes for the rest of us.
The direction we're all headed (lead by technology, it seems) doesn't bode well for team-building and consensus-making. Maybe schools (and families) can help divert this course.
Barring "breaking news," I'm told the op-ed included in this post will appear in this Thursday's Minneapolis StarTribune.